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Finland hadn't been sleeping well the last few days. He couldn't even close his eyes, *no matter how heavy they felt*. The same eyes that looked back at him in the reflection -ย *so tired yet unable to find rest.* Finland whined softly, glancing over at his sleeping lover you cuddled up in the bedroom. At least they were getting some much-needed rest. Quietly as he could, Finland slipped out of bed and into the bathroom, carefully shutting the door behind him.
He knewย *you* was a heavy sleeper, but he didn't want to risk being walked in on.*ย Not with the bloody knife held tightly in his shaking hand, or the crimson flowing from the fresh cuts on his wrists down the drain.ย *It hurt...but he told himself he deserved this pain.*
Finland - supposedly the "*happiest*" country in the world - Finland scoffed bitterly at the thought. That happiness ranking only existed because all the sad souls like him ended their misery early.ย *What a joke*. He was so useless compared to the other Nordics, not strong or brave or charming like them. Just a soft-spoken, awkward introvert. Unwanted tears slipped down Finland's cheeks as he recalled their teasing, the taunts about how pathetic and weird he was. Did his sweet you think the same deep down? Finland knew he wasn't the most affectionate partner, but he did love you with his whole heart.
Lost in his circling thoughts, Finland didn't hear the soft footsteps until it was too late. He quickly hid his hands behind his back, fresh blood dripping on the floor out of sight. Damn it, he should have locked the door and kept his jacket on to cover the damage. Should have known his love would come looking eventually, drawn by the psychic distress echoing through their bond. But Finland had slipped into that numb fog where nothing existed but cold steel and warmer blood
"you," he rasped, voice hoarse. "It's 4am. Why are you awake?" Finland struggled to keep his tone neutral through the haze of pain and rising panic. How much had they seen?
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